Chinese Scandals – Sexy Enough For You?

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Gu's 90 year old mom (pictured) is beside herself.



-by Ernie Diaz



Just when you thought you had more important stuff to worry about – bonfires across the Middle East, a teetering global economy – China’s juiciest trial since the Gang of Four finally got hauled in. And let’s be honest, the trial only a stage for what keeps all eyeballs glued, high-profile scandal.


Toss out the window all that Western MSM speculation about this Bo Xilai fracas testing the CCP’s authority. Whatever the verdict, this scandal will have as much effect on the party’s stability as Bill Clinton’s spare DNA had on his.


The politics add clout to Gu Kailai’s trial, but the real reason global Q-ratings are through the roof? It’s sexy. The LIBOR scandal has far graver implications, but it’s not sexy. Fly-blown children starving on piles of refuse, slavery still rampant across the globe… so not sexy. Scandals are sexy, diddling our cultural buttons until millions climax into catharsis. The OJ scandal was sexy as hell, a coked-up Hollywood interracial love triangle.


The case of Gu Kailai titillates all the erogenous zones. Corruption (shocker) – check. Love affair – check – and behind the back of her supertzar husband…with a foreigner! Murder – check. Not anonymous drone murder of brown people (tres non-sexy), but a Chinese mistress of the universe, poisoning an Englishman, with help from her butler! Far though the Internet has taken us from Victorian morals, the 19th century potboiler formula retains the power to keep us waiting breathlessly for the next installment, like old maids in corsets.


The trial only took seven hours, incidentally, and Ms Gu will be officially spending the remainder of her days in a country club with chicken wire on the windows. Not incidentally, because the western media circus would demand a much longer act. And what did those MSM flacks think all that “Tiger Mom” stuff was about , anyway– homework? A middle-class Chinese mom will corner you with broad smiles and deferential force of personality. An ultra-wealthy-connected Tiger Mom will turn her claws on you, rend you as the tiger rends the gazelle, if you threaten her young.


Maybe a look at some other high-profile Chinese scandals, past and present, will serve to shed light on the Chinese collective subconscious, the attitude towards an authoritarian state, one which won’t set them free to choose whether they want a cool black guy or a rich white guy MC-ing the NWO’s endgame.




Literal Femme Fatale

Jiang Qing


Mao Zedong’s fourth and last wife made Hilary Clinton look like a stay-at-home mom, spinning her un-mandated power into hurricane force during the Cultural Revolution. Dilemma: if the Great Leader is infallible, are we allowed to complain that his wife is a vindictive beyotch? That some ex-movie-floozy holds absolute power over all national institutions with her three partners in crime revolution?


Just how many Chinese secretly admired Jiang Qing, attacking living gods such as Deng Xiaoping and Lin Biao, Xinhua doesn’t record. But too much power soon drove her off the reservation. She hounded Fan Jin to her death, simply for marrying her ex-husband.She had her Red Guard dogs kidnap Zhou Enlai’s children and torture them to death.




So still got it.

When Mao passed on, so too did her reign of terror. Considering the tragic wake her Gang of Four had torn through China, the fact that her death sentence was commuted to life imprisonment speaks not to Chinese respect for women, but the delicate tightrope a State must walk when its leaders don’t make mistakes.




"Only don't tell me you're innocent. Because that insults me, and it makes me very angry."

Chongqing Gang Trial


As Master Po would put it to Grasshopper, “Only a tiger can chase away other tigers!”


Considering how hard it is to shine light on high-level cockroaches, let alone stamp them out, in China or elsewhere, there must have been a few savvy outsiders wondering at the efficacy with which Bo Xilai cleaned up Chongqing.


Chongqing has long been the mainland capital of organized crime for the same reason it was Chiang Kai-shek’s wartime capital – its Triads, invisible, freemason-affiliated, and an utterly worthwhile realm of study, given the paucity of information on them in their current incarnation.


In any event, Bo Xilai rounded up 19 of their bosses, hundreds of members, a total of 4,781 arrests. Whether the party officials arrested, including police commissioner Wen Qiang, can be counted as members or just affiliates, is a fascinating but fruitless matter for speculation. One can only re-watch L.A. Confidential, wherein the cops decide rackets are far too lucrative to be letting the hoods run them.




Two minutes. Not two minutes would you last in her world.

But corruption and murder in spades don’t hold attention. The all-important sexy factor came in the form of one Xie Caiping, the Godmother of Chongqing, and since-executed Commissioner Wen’s sister-in-law. Her stable of young studs and liberal use of profanity during testimony kept the story humming. In China, as in the West, if murders aren’t sexy, they’re just a statistic.




Li Gang


On either side of the Pacific, boys will be boys, racing their souped-up rice-rockets down busy thoroughfares. The inevitable hitting of a pedestrian, however, is expected to confer an instant man-sized helping of remorse, at least in the West. After crashing into young student Chen Xiaofeng, who later died from her injuries, Li fled the scene to drop his sweetheart off at her dorm. When apprehended by security guards, he challenged them, “Sue me if you dare – my father is Li Gang!”


In the Occident, such blatant name-dropping went out with F. Scott Fitzgerald. And a note to wannabe Chinese princelings, your father better have serious clout if you’re going to swing his name around to get out of vehicular homicide.




Relax, it's an act.

Alas, Li Gang was but deputy director of the public security bureau for Baoding, a dismal little burg of 12 million an hour-and-a-half’s drive from Beijing. Sensing official weakness, China’s avenging internet force soon created enough waves that Papa Gang was tearfully apologizing for his vile sprog on TV, followed soon by an equally lachrymose son. Who is actually serving junior’s six-year sentence? That’s another story.



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